Monday, March 27, 2017

As My Parents Age: Reflection on Life, Love, and Change by Cynthia Ruchti

As My Parents Age: Reflections on Life, Love and Change
Cynthia Ruchti
copyright © 2017 Cynthia Ruchti
Published by Worthy Inspired
ISBN: 978-1-61795-752-9

I didn't know what a healing I would receive when I read this wonderful spiritual book.

Ruchti brings us face to face with what it means to become the caretaker of an aging, or ailing, parent. In my family, I was the one who took care of my mother-n-law during her final days of this life. But my own Mother and Father were taken care of by my sweet sister.

Often I feel guilty for leaving her with such a burden. She's given up 22 years of her life so far, just to see that they had a home and the care that they need. We lost Mother two years ago, and my sweet sister continues in caring for our Father. She has never once complained. Instead, she has told me over and over that it has been her privilege.

I feel guilty because I don't have that patience! At least not with my own parents! But I didn't know why, until I read this book. I just couldn't come face to face with knowing that their days were numbered.

I never gave a thought of my parents one day aging, or worse, dying. No. They were always the stalwart rock that stood upon our Savior. I was along for the ride for the most part.

I was born again when I was only 10. But have I really understood how and what it meant for ME to stand on the rock, our Lord and Savior?

I have had the scales taken away from my eyes, thanks to Ruchti. And I can face my fears now.  The fear of being alone. Of feeling like an orphan, even at my age.

The copy of this book that I read is an Uncorrected Proof, so when it is in its final print, it may be a little different. But here are the titles to the chapters in this amazing book:

1. When I Notice The First Signs
2. When It Comes Down to What Matters Most
3. When They're Miles and Miles Away
4. When We Mourn and Embrace the Role Reversal
5. When My Children Need Me Too
6. When My Parents Won't Accept Help
7. When I'm Tempted to Help Too Much
8. When My Siblings Disagree on My Parent's Care
9. When My Parents Won't Have the Hard Conversation
10. When They Can't Let Old Hurts Go
11. When I Can't Let Old Hurts Go
12. When All We Can Do Is Laugh
13. When My Parent is in Denial
14. When My Parent's Strongest Gift is Stubborness
15. When My Parents Make Unwise Decisions
16. When My Gratitude Gets Lost in Life's Wrinkles
17. When I Don't Know What to Pray
18. When My Parent's Mind is Gone
19. When I Think I Can't Make an Impact
20. When My Parent Loses Who I Am
21. When they Think Life No Longer Has Meaning
22. When Their Aging Changes Me
23. When It's Just Plain Hard
24. When I Don't Know What to Say
25. When Time is All They Want From Me
26. When Guilt Taints Our Relationship
27. When My Parents Needs Cost Me
28. When I Feel As If The Battle Is Mine Alone
29. When I Can't Keep My Promise to My Parents
30. When I Don't Recognize or Like
31. When Every Story is From The Past
32. When Visiting Deepens My Pain...and My Understanding
33. When No One Understands or Knows How to Help
34. When My Efforts Seem So Small
35. When The End is Too Near
36. When I'm Already Grieving
37. When They Die Too Young
38. When My Skills and Love are No Longer Enough
39. When the Moment Comes to Say Good-bye
40. When I Shift to Life Without My Parents

If you are caring for a parent, I know you will have recognized yourself in at least one chapter title. That is why I took the time to name each one.

Using Scripture, and the teachings of our Savior, Ruchti leads us through these terrible hard times. These times when you are overwhelmed and don't know what to do next. When nothing seems right. And your world is suddenly turned upside down.

I wish I had read this book years ago when my Mother first became ill. I might have been able to help my sister more. But through reading this, I realize the struggles she must have endured, in her own private, quiet space.

She is truly my hero!

I give this book five stars.

A big thumbs up.

And my personal recommendation.

You can find this book available HERE. It is only available in hardback. And it is at a reasonable cost of $11.00 plus shipping and handling.

****DISCLAIMER: This book was provided by Amazon Vine in exchange for a fair and impartial review. The opinions above are solely those of this blog's author.

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